A man, a mission, an essay

Can you believe it’s only a month and a half away? I can’t. And soon I’ll probably be saying, “I can’t believe the bibliographic essay is due next week.” Hopefully by then I’ll have my topic chosen and all of my sources in order. As for now, I’m still undecided and haven’t made up my mind on what I am going to do it on.

But, that doesn’t mean that I haven’t been thinking about it. So far, I am leaning towards synchronous vs. asynchronous. Hopefully I’ll get down to business real soon and look up some articles on the good old Internet. I haven’t done that yet, but never fear, I’ll get down to it.

I have been thinking about different topics and none have really stood out to me. There hasn’t been any specific topic that has ignited a fire in my soul. But then again, I probably don’t expect that to happen. So, for now, you can expect that I’ll be writing about synchronous tutoring versus asynchronous tutoring. I’ll delve into the deepest depths of the subject and bring out all the remarks of the scholarly world that pertain to the subject.

Of all the subjects I have thought about, this one seems the best so far. I feel that I am at least more interested in this than the others that have scrolled through my brain. And I know as well as the next guy that it is pointless to write about something that doesn’t interest you. Many a paper have I had to write that simply bored me to death. I don’t’ want this paper to be that way because it will make it so much harder. If I am not interested in what I’m writing about, I’ll probably put it off until the last minute and end up doing a so-so job on it. So, unless something stands out to me in the near future, you can plan on Derek Stout submitting a paper about both the woes and joys that accompany this particular subject.

On a related topic, I was recently enjoying the company of some rather jovial friends. As we conversed, one of them was telling a rather enjoyable story and said “me and my friend” and the first thing that went through my head was “my friend and I.” Isn’t that neat!? It just goes to show how tutoring has impacted my personal life. I’ve got English on the brain and when I hear it being misused I often find myself correcting it.

Okay, I know that that wasn’t really a related topic to the prompt, but five hundred words can be a lot. I’ll I really needed was three words “synchronous versus asynchronous.” But, I gave it my all and decided that a small story that related to the course would be in order. If I was out of line, I seek forgiveness and hope that my folly will not be frowned upon and held against me. Well, there you have it.

I'm too tired to be clever with the title

I am doing research about tutoring people with disabilities. Why am I doing this? My life experiences have helped me develop a deep interest in educating people with differences. You know that three of my sons have autism. I also have a brother with Spina Bifida who doesn’t come to WSU because his wheelchair doesn’t get around well in the snow. One of my sisters would like to come here, but she suffers from anxiety issues and is scared to death of heights. (She would have a lot of difficulty with all the stairs.) I spent almost three years working as a classroom aide for a boy with severe physical and cognitive disabilities. I just seem to be surrounded by people with differing challenges, and I don’t mind at all. In fact, I think I’d be happy spending the rest of my life educating and advocating for people who have disabilities.

Just last month I worked with a student who had challenges similar to those of my sons. I didn’t ask him if he was autistic - that wouldn’t be ethical. Still, as the session progressed I found myself noticing more and more of his interesting behaviors and personal quirks. I worked around them, and we ended up having a marvelous time.

But what if I hadn’t had so many experiences with people of differing abilities? Would I think his odd behavior was understandable, or would I have lost my patience or rolled my eyes at him? Would I have been afraid of him?

About twenty years ago I met some boys with “invisible disabilities,” and I am ashamed to say my first response to them was less than helpful. I thought, and even said out loud, that these were some weird kids. One boy heard it, and I could see that it hurt him. I felt awful. We became friends later, but I never really got over that time when my ignorance caused pain for someone else.

In the generation before mine people feared the disabled. They sent them off to “asylums” so no one would have to see them. What were they thinking? I don’t understand why so many people were just thrown away like that. I cannot imagine the world without “mongoloid eyes” and people who talk with their hands. I would have been so much more oblivious if I had never ridden a bicycle-built-for-two with my cousin who is blind. Besides, she is a great conversationalist.

I want to know how we can make it easier for people with differences. I plan to do my research on ways that writing centers have served people who have disabilities. I want to see where we were in the past, how far we have come, and where we need to go in the future. I want to help educate the public so we won’t be guilty of putting anyone in any kind of asylum, be it physical or social. Our society needs the diversity that can be found in its marvelous people with differing abilities.

She said that he said that I said something ambiguous.

A ten page paper in which I don't get to include my completely unsupported arguments just to take up space? This is a type of paper that i am not at all familiar with. Taking that into consideration, i really should pick a topic that is fairly well documented. As i understand it, the whole point of this paper is to reiterate the ideas, problems, and benefits of the chosen topic. Just about the worst thing i can imagine is choosing a topic such as "the relationship between tutoring and fishing," for which there is little, if any, reference material. I want to have as much to regurgitate as is humanly possible.

There is another important factor to consider in choosing the topic: how applicable will it be? I am going to be attending the Writing Conference next year in February, so choosing a topic that can fill both criteria would be very advantageous. This is somewhat reminiscent of my thought process in deciding what to research and write about: Engaging reluctant writers. This is, of course a very broad topic, which is what I intended. A narrow topic would be hard to research due to lack of material. A broad topic, however, presents the exact opposite problem- an overload of information.

The trick then, will be organization. I haven't quite figured this out yet, but if I narrow my essay to specific problems, ideas, or benefits, it will be much easier to acquire the information I need. Perhaps I can start with a general introduction to the problem, namely, getting student writers involved in the tutoring session. Following that would be a discussion about the various problems that student writers may face during a tutoring session. Then I could proceed to discuss the current methods and tutoring strategies available to alleviate the situation.

Tutoring is a dynamic and multi-faceted challenge which requires an able and versatile mind to master its intricate methods. Well, I don't really want to get off on a tangent here. My current topic for the MLA bibliographic essay: Engaging Reluctant Writers.

Paper Topic (Sorry, I can't think of an interesting title for this one)

When it comes to this essay, I have huge writer’s block. Of course, I haven’t been thinking about it too intensely because of other things going on, but now that it has moved up a bit on my priority list I think that I have no idea what I think…It seems that the ones I was slightly thinking about are already being thought about by most everybody else as well. I was, for example, thinking about writing about synchronous vs. asynchronous tutoring, but since half the class has mentioned that as their possible topic I think I may steer clear of that (unless, of course, they’re all struggling for a subject like I am and that’s the first thing on top of their heads as well…in which case I feel much less alone in the world :D). I was also considering talking about the differences of writing and talking language that Emig was talking about. I think that that one might be a good topic, and her essay truly intrigued me. I think I may do it on that…Hooray! An epiphany!
Now I just have to find things about that topic and start reading them. One thing that did peak (or is it pique?) my curiosity about that subject was when Emig started talking about and quoting other professionals in her field that wrote on the same subject. Apart from giving me a good start on where to find my bibliographical information, it also made me curious. It also made me confused because of some different things that both Emig and the others refer to. This may show off my limited vocabulary, but I definitely had a huge question mark forming over my head when I started reading about things like “immediate synpractical connections,” and “speech-cum-action.” I wanted to look up what these were and try to figure out what they meant, mostly in order to more fully understand what Emig was talking about, but I actually didn’t have the time nor the motivation to do so. Luckily, I can contest that with this assignment.
Mostly I just found that there was much in the essay that I could write, explain, find other research on. For example, does everyone agree with Emig’s definition of writing? If not, how do they differ? Does that have an effect on how the theories on how to teach writing differ? Does this type of teaching have a sort of rubbing-off effect on other subjects? Though it may be that there’s not much written on some of these subject, the differences in opinion concerning them may be the “camps” I could separate my paper into, as well as the general e areas where I could expand and talk about different connections more. You know, the more I type about this idea (and think about it) the more I like it. Of course, now I’m getting to the babbling point where my brain starts putting feelers out to the rest of my brain and then it all comes spilling out…so, in order to prevent extraneous overflow, I think I’d better call it quits here for now.

It'll come to me...someday

So...what am I planning on writing the bibliographic essay on?

Something.

I'm not too sure what, but I know it will be about something! Something concerning the Writing Center! More or less.

One particular something that I thought would be interesting would be looking up information on the topic of the development of the Writing Center's goal--to better the students or to better the paper. Has it always been like that? According to the essays we've read in class, definitely not, and thus an idea! Or an epiphany? Yeah, that word sounds more sophisticated.

In relation to that topic of consideration though, I'm not all to sure how to word it or approach it. A history of the development of the Writing Center's purpose? The comparing and contrasting of what professors, students, and tutors view as the Writing Center's purpose? Or maybe should I just throw my lot in and go big with "the Writing Center's purpose?"

Oh well. I'll figure it out in time. I bet someone in a past class has posted a blog entry about this topic somewhere. Now I just need to find it.

If not, then the back up plan is something that I know can rack up some good sources--online tutoring versus face to face tutoring. Is it any better than dropping off the paper and coming to pick it up later? Even with the real time chat room, will the tutoring session still suffer with the lack of body language and tone? True, there can always be voice chat, and sometimes maybe even body language, but with this technology still something that is not as household item as a TV or headphones, would tutoring sessions as a whole suffer from this lack of communication?

True, words are pretty much what people think of with communication. But a great chunk of communication comes from body language and tone--something that is devastatingly missing from online tutoring sessions, whether in real time, video chat, voice chat, or all three.

Sounds complicated. Maybe the whole "Writing Center's purpose" idea might be the best way out after all.

your soup looks like brains

The most intriguing aspect of tutoring thus far has been the basis of Janet Emig's essay on the learning process of writing. I think it is the scientific aspect of the actual philosophy and big picture of learning that I would like to delve a little deeper into. I want to record the studies of the brain whilst communicating and learning. I want to talk about how to incorporate those studies into an active technique of teaching or tutoring. Communication is one of the most fascinating things to me, and Emig's gathered information on studying the brain and the action within the hemispheres definitely caught my interest. Studying the structure of communication and its distribution throughout the brain is fascinating to me, and I don't think I could have known how to word that, or that it even interested me, prior to reading Emig's argument.

I think that this topic is a little broad right now. I will have to modify it and focus it a little more primarily on the application it will have in writing centers in the future. Until then, I anticipate researching this topic and getting a general view of the progress this concept has made over the years, and organizing it into a document. I hope to attain some knowledge on the process of writing and maybe formulate an opinion on any controversies or arising questions pertaining to the topic.

Beginning the research process with Emig's essay will definitely provide me with an adequate foundation to build upon. I know that Emig's references will also be of great help to me. I think the knowledge gained in researching this topic can be applied to other areas, and I look forward to feeling confident on conversing about this topic in life. I think that sounds a little cheesy, but it is a philosophical concept, the process of learning and knowledge, while it is also an observable and worthwhile area of scientific study. Quite interesting. I am enthused about it, I hope research is abundant and specific, and I am hopeful about the completed product as well as the research process.

Final Paper Topics

To be honest I have no idea what I am going to write my final paper about. I have been busy trying to come up with paper topics for my other two classes and trying to put together a halfway decent presentation for RMMLA.
However, several topics have piqued my interest. One such topic is intellectual property, especially in the new age of Twitter and blogging. Another one is a rubric for what makes good writing. Looking at sentence level errors versus paragraph and larger errors. Can we quantify good writing? Or is it like pornography, we know it when we see it?
I do think that this paper will pose more of a challenge than the other papers I will write this semester. It is going to be hard to do a bunch of research and just write it down rather than arguing a point and using research to back it up. I am much more comfortable in the second vein of writing. The first vein feels more like research for a presentation.
For example, over the summer a took a history of language and literary texts course and I had to present the current ideas about the origins of the languages we all speak or the history of the Indo-European languages. The experts fell into three distinct camps, one believing we came from Turkey, one believing we came from the Asian steppes and the genetic camp who was still unsure as to our origins, except that at some point back we all came from Africa. I explained the holes in the theories, like how Basque exists and yet matches no other languages, but it was a fifteen to twenty minute presentation with a single page handout. That is easy. But putting together a long paper with just information I don't think will be as easy. This is my concern. If I had to write a paper on the subject, I probably would have sided with one of the camps and then presented evidence that supported that. "Just the facts ma'am" kind of confounds me. Perhaps it is because most of the writing that I have been doing up to this point is the argumentative kind.
Is anyone else worried, or just me? I'll be okay because I have to be, but that does not mean I won't panic and freak out before hand.
I also have to say that at RMMLA I heard an interesting paper saying that many of the social conventions and restrictions that are put upon us by society and internalized (the Foucauldian panopticon) have turned many of us into zombies. Is this perhaps what the rigid schooling has lead us to? Is this why we have such a fascination for zombies? Why Zombieland is number one at the box office right now? Do you think that our grading system and our teaching of centuries old texts has created a nation of zombies? Food for thought (pun intended).
At the end of the day, my paper will most likely be guided by what all my papers are guided by -- my research. I find that only after reading a bunch of other peoples' stuff do I actually come up with anything to say. I'm hoping that this applies for this paper as well.

Slacker Blog for Procrastinators

Just so everyone is aware procrastinators are the leaders of tomorrow.
Anyway, just to add to the blog, here's a little something I am thinking about writing for a final paper for another class. Please let me know what you think.

“Death Hilarious:” The Bakhtinian Fool, Violence, Laughter and the Harlequin in the Works of Cormac McCarthy

Cormac McCarthy’s Blood Meridian or Evening Redness in the West (1985) is regarded as his most complex and by some his best novel. Because of this more criticism is written about it than any other of his novels. Much of the criticism centers around the violence in the novel compared to the Vietnam conflict, or to the Westward expansion of America. However, the criticism lacks the association that the novel makes again and again – that of violence and humor. The nightmarish world of Blood Meridian becomes a Carnival of the borderlands, the in-between spaces occupied by the figure of the harlequin. Instead of a celebration, however, we have a danse macabre. McCarthy uses the association of violence and laughter to help us strip away our bourgeois mythos about America and the grotesque. McCarthy uses laughter to make us focus on the violence that formed our nation. We can no longer maintain a civilized and untainted distance. As Bakhtin points out in The Dialogic Imagination
It is precisely laughter that destroys the epic, and in general destroys any hierarchical (distancing and valorized) distance. As a distanced image a subject cannot be comical; to be made comical it must be brought close…Laughter has the remarkable power of making an object come up close, of drawing it into a zone of crude contact where one can finger it familiarly on all sides, turn it upside down, inside out, peer at it from about and below, break open its external shell, look into its center…Laughter demolishes fear and piety before an object…making it an object of familiar contact (23).
McCarthy’s use of laughter forces us to look up close at the violence of the novel and more importantly, at the violence within ourselves. He creates a space of familiarity. Violence and death are no longer remote objects that cannot taint our middle class sensibilities, but move to an inner space. McCarthy is putting the Catholic Christ back up on the cross. He wants to take away our image of the clean Jesus free cross of Protestantism. McCarthy wants us to look at the emaciated Jesus with wounds and strip away the mythos that we have created about ourselves as Americans and “sensible” human beings. We are forced to look inward and see the violence that is inherent within all of us. The world of Blood Meridian is no longer the distance past, but our present. We are Blood Meridian.
However this violence is not limited to the confines of Blood Meridian. McCarthy’s novels offer up a carnival of characters who are marked by the violence that surrounds them and is within them. Yet, they are not so far from us. For if Lester Ballard, the necrophiliac protagonist of Child of God, is a child of god just like the rest of us, then we are not so far removed from the carnage and depravity that marks many of McCarthy’s characters’ lives. Even within the fairly traditional love story/bildungsroman of All the Pretty Horses we have bloodshed and corruption. These harlequin people lived just as we do, all touched by the innate nature of human beings.
“[...] all the horsemen’s faces gaudy and grotesque with daubings like a company of mounted clowns, death hilarious” (McCarthy 52-3). With these lines, the narrator of Blood Meridian describes the raid of a group of Comanche Indians in the desert. The Comanche’s are messengers of death and violence, dressed in the costume of the harlequin. They are in fact, hybrids. They are mixtures of the new invasion of the white man and a clinging to the past. Most of McCarthy’s novels feature hybrid people. These are people of mixed spaces, mixed times. They are like the harlequin—black and white, a blending of things. This is the new face of America. We are a mix of old and new, and we all exist in a borderland whether it be within ourselves or forced upon us by the outside world.

Weekly Prompt

So. What are you all thinking about doing your bibliographic essays on?

The Postseason

Slacker time? I don't have any time to slack off. I don't have time to do anything anymore.

I graduated with my B.A. in May of last year. I decided to take a year off before I would start my grad program. I was burnt out and I wanted to not think about writing papers and reading for the first time in five years. I began working a full time job and the money coming in was nice. But when September rolled around, I began to miss the school routine. I was missing doing some homework. I actually wanted to have an assignment. It was weird. I would think like this many times during a normal day. But then I'd say to myself, "You're free!" I was able to go to the gym, go out on weeknights, and even go out in the morning and do stuff. By the way, walking around at 9 a.m. around Ogden is weird. Banks are actually open, elderly people are shopping, and the sun is positioned a bit differently. It was a lovely time. As I began to apply to graduate programs, I began to realize this freedom would soon go away. But I didn't care. It was December and I still had 8 months until grad school. In the spring, I was accepted to Michigan State University and their Graduate Program of Rhetoric & Writing. I was thrilled. But I got bad news. They did not have any financial aid for me. I would have had to pay close to $20,000 to go there. I was not about to do that. I was so disappointed. Not because I was going to have to stay here; I was disappointed because I really wanted to leave Utah and have a new start in a new school. I was accepted to Weber's Master of Arts in English program a few weeks after that. I am currently taking two masters classes. This one and Intro to Linguistics. I really like both of them.

I have 2 months doing masters-level work. After 2 months, I realize how tough the next 2 years are going to be. I miss my freedom....badly! I knew my freedom was going to be gone, but I didn't realize how masters-level work was going to change things. This is definitely NOT undergraduate-level work. I wish I had that. Masters work is tough in the sense that you want to put in as much detail as you can in your work. Not saying that you wouldn't do that in your undergraduate work, but there's something about knowing that you are doing grad work that changes the way you see things. I am a huge sports fan, so I see things with a sports eye. I consider undergrad work as the regular season in a league. You do your best, get a lucky break here or there, and then you end it on a great streak. Grad work is like the postseason. There is no room for error. This is where the best ones shine and get the job done in pressure situations. I am in the postseason! Sure, I have no time to go have a drink with friends. I don't have time to go have a fun Saturday with the family. I don't have time to even update my facebook. But it's OK because I'm in the postseason now! The big boys (and girls) step up and become champions here. All (or most at least) of the great ones have done it. I plan on becoming a champion, just like my beloved Yankees will be this year, in 2 years. It's going to be a rough postseason, but I survived the regular season. If you can survive the long regular season, you can make the postseason. But as far as winning in the postseason, that's something I'll tell you how to do after I get my masters.

Slacker prompt is slacker prompt

I'm more of a slacker than all y'all...and I'm killing zombies while I'm at it.

I don't know why it's so difficult for people to believe me when I tell them about my awesome zombie dreams. Seriously, I have action-packed, thoroughly insane dreams involving zombies. And shapeshifters. And wacky wizards. And siblings I've never had. And by "awesome" I mean these dreams are worthy of first rate Hollywood production.

Totally.

Sure, zombies are fairly overdone nowadays what with all the crazy zombie hype, which in my opinion is topped by the video game Left 4 Dead. There's no other game I've played where you can shoot your friend in the back and then lock him out of the safe room to distract the horde of diseased, rabid, zombie-like humans trying to rip your team of survivors to pieces. Of course, the said sacrifice often takes out some zombies while he's flailing and yelling and cussing at you and the remaining teammates over the microphone, so it's not a complete loss!

It's totally wicked when you can use your friend as a pipe bomb and then resurrect him in a closet. Maybe that's why the game's tagline is, "It's the zombie apocalypse...bring friends."

So. Why bring up this rather random topic? Well, if I remember correctly, on the first day of class while perusing the syllabus, we came across the H1N1 game plan and apparently learned that it would probably only go in effect in the face of the zombie apocalypse.

Hey, it could happen. And if it did, would YOU be ready to survive it?

Granted, if it's one of those bordering supernatural viruses so popular in various movies (and Left 4 Dead video games), then if you're not inherently immune to it you won't have to worry about surviving! Just run with the rest of the horde and make the survivor's lives more miserable and game-worthy. But if you do end up immune, then how about it? What would you do?

Tip 1: First off, you're going to need to get yourself some friends. Preferably at least two--one who can run faster than you and one who can run slower. You'll especially need the guy who runs slower. Why? Well...let's just say you're going to need a lack of a conscience. No "one for all and all for one" if it means you'll end up as zombie fodder. Survival of the fittest. But just remember: once the guy who runs slower than you ends up dead, you're going to be the slowest.

Tip 2: The second most important item for survival would be a weapon. Or two. Or several. Preferably at least two--a melee and a long range. So let's say a baseball bat and gun. You need the gun for obvious reasons--and while you're at it try to find some bullets. Lots and lots of bullets. You need the baseball bat for when you run out of bullets in the machine gun...plus the bat can beat down walls and windows and doors and hit more than one zombie if you swing it enough. The number one rule to remember with weapons though, is that you really CAN have enough. If it's going to make you the slowest in the group, then it won't matter how many weapons you're carrying--you're going to end up as the group's pipe bomb.

Tip 3: Thirdly, know the territory. If you're running blindly you're going to end up running blindly right into a dead end or an open manhole. Pretty indignant way to die. It also helps to know where's high ground--it seems that quite a few zombie movies and video games portray zombies as being unable to climb up to high areas. Or something. Either way, a few safe houses plus a good idea of where supplies are may save your life.

Well, it seems I've overblown my word count limit so that's it for now kids. Next slacker prompt, we'll try to tackle the vampire discussion and whether they should sparkle or not.