Lightning just struck my brain

Aren't epiphanies the greatest things in the world?

For the longest time, I thought I would write my bibliographic essay about tutoring in hostile situations. The long session I had with the incredibly rude, cell phone answering, eye rolling student drove me to see if I could find more about such situations. I had some ridiculous idea that if I could find enough literature about tutoring in hostile situations, I would know exactly why that student had been hostile. And let's be honest -- I wanted to write my bibliographic essay on that topic for my own cathartic purposes. Even after a couple of months, the incident still bothered me worse than having my prosthetic eye in upside down (and trust me, that is not a comfortable situation). Nothing like a good, old fashioned "purging of emotion" to get rid of all my feelings of worry and guilt. Yes -- oddly enough, I feel I am as much to blame for the situation as the student was. Maybe I needed to be a little more involved. Maybe I needed more understanding. Maybe I needed to open my eyes a little wider.

On Thursday, after a few days of searching the database for articles on just such situations, I still had not found anything. I talked to Claire about my difficulties in searching, and she suggested using the key words "reluctant writers" instead of the word "hostile." What's not to love about euphemism? Reluctant still seems like such a kind word to use when describing that student. The search turned up more results and I started to look at them. And then I realized: the best way for me to put that session behind me is to put it behind me and write something new. Besides, I wasn't too fond of most of the articles I found.

Then I opened our textbook for what seemed the umpty-trillionth time and started to thumb through it. Nothing stood out, probably because I thumbed through it in much the same way I thumb through flip books: the idea is to look occupied and engaged even if you are staring past the magically moving pictures. On a whim, I decided to glance through the table of contents. I found this title: "Is There a Creative Writer in the House? Tutoring to Enhance Creativity and Engagement."

My thought process ran something like this: Hmm. Good title. I like creativity. I am a creative person. Creative writing is my favorite thing to do. Creative writing is my major. (This is where the epiphany came in.) Hey, creative writing is my major! (Before you mock me, please note -- not all epiphanies involve highly intelligent thinking. Obviously.) So my bibliographic essay will be about tutoring creative writing/tutoring creatively in the writing center. I'm excited! And this is already proving to be cathartic because involving myself in research I enjoy has been far more emotionally cleansing than stewing over that one nasty session as I researched hostility (sorry, "reluctant writing") in the writing center.

Blah Blog

Does anyone else feel a little overwhelmed lately? I do. Maybe it is because everything is catching up with me--- tests, assignments, projects, etc.---Today I left the Writing Center feeling like I forgot something, but I couldn't figure out what it was. I hate that.

I have a groove. I really do. You know, like on the Emperor's new groove... "I'm sorry but you have thrown off the Emperor's groove."--- "Sooorrrrryy!!" :)

I was telling Kirsten about my groove earlier today. Like me, she forgets things sometimes. After work, she forgot to take her lanyard off. I told her that I used to do that all the time, but I created a groove to remembering to take off my lanyard and now I remember to take it off before I go home. I connect my remembering to take my lanyard off with remembering to put my folder away. When I remember to put my folder away, I remind myself to take my lanyard off. I connect my thoughts together all the time. It helps me remember to do the mundane tasks that need to be done. It has its advantages and disadvantages. One disadvantage is that if I forget to do something, then my groove can be thrown off. And that is an annoying experience.

It is a chain reaction; if I forget to do one thing then I forget to do the next thing I need to do. I generally have a row of tasks connected to each other. It bothers me when I know I forgot to do something or grab something but I can't think what it is. Of course, as Murphy’s law would have it, I remember what I have forgotten hours later when I am leaving or driving in my car; or sometimes I wake up and remember what it is I was suppose to do. One time I woke up and remembered that I had a quiz in the morning and I hadn't studied for it yet. That wasn't a happy remembering experience.

I'm kind of curious. Does anyone else, besides Kirsten and me, have a groove? Does it ever get thrown off? What do you do to get back on track? How do you remember things? Do you guys create a groove in tutoring sessions?

I have been developing a method of asking how the session should proceed. I mean, I still go by the student's needs, and no two sessions are identical but I do have a way of asking whether or not the student has been entered into the computer, what the tutee's name is--- etc. It's all about timing--- interjecting questions, comments and input at the right time--- My groove could almost be considered dancing. I'm a horrible dancer, but when everything falls into place, I feel like I don't have two-left feet anymore and I can dance. I like it when everything falls into place. So, please...“Don’t throw off the groove!…”

Oops!

I didn't notice that when my original post this week got eaten by Blogger, my prompt got eaten, too. Consider this a prompt for this week and the next: what are you thinking about writing your bibliographic essay about?

Hmmmm........

I've been looking through "A Tutor's Guide: Helping Writers One to One" and the only thing that sparks any 10 page interest for me is ESL tutoring, so I'll be doing my essay on that.

There really isn't much to say right now about it since I haven't gotten very far yet. I just think I could benefit from learning about the research or experiments people have done on the various ethnic backgrounds of writer's who come to the USA for schooling and who struggle to understand the way we write.

Also, I'm sure the more I learn about ESL students, the better I can tutor them, of course. As I have tutored ESL students, I have learned of some different ways they think and the many crazy little words we have to use in order to make sense in our writing. I think if a person can learn English, they can learn anything.

Language is facinating to me. I'd like to learn to speak several languages and I think I could in the time it takes a non-native English speaker to learn English. There are so many ways of looking at writing and thinking about it that language becomes a barrier or a facilitator, depending on how much of it you know.

I look forward to learning more and getting to know those people who come from a far away land to become education here in America's university systems.

Order is a Fantasy

Order, in essence is an imaginery thing. We create our sense of order, or perhaps we are born with some divine sense of it, for such a pupose as to make sense out of the true chaos life really is. Each culture, and truly, each individual has his/her own definition. Perhaps that's the biggest sign we have of its artificiality.

But as I pondered about it in class, it seems that there must be some orders that serve more purposes than others; in this way the type of order that serves the largest number of individuals must be, in general, considered more effective. I'm still bothered by the author of the chapter on order's allusion that some how her messy office is just as functional as her friends: labeled and categorized. True, the author's office might serve her well enough, but what if anyone else tried to find anything in it?

I guess that's what I mean when I think of order. Not so much a system of organization or a specific level of cleanliness or tidiness. Rather, I measure it by thinking about the ease that someone not familiar with our form of order could find something or feel comfortable in such a place.

And I feel this relates perfectly to writing. True, that with our personal writing we can be as creative with organization as we'd like. We can go so far as to confuse even ourselves. But when writing in an academic setting, we need to follow certain rules so that those reading the papers (mostly professors I know, but I think they deserve a little bit of help, don't think?) can follow theorganization enough that they can understand the main points.

I think it's interesting that we watched that film on diversity after discussing order to such an extent. I think that one of the biggest differences I see between cultures in regards to writing is the way they setup their order within papers. Again, I do believe that any organization is fine with personal writing, but I guess I find that some of the possible plans for order seem more effective than others. Please don't think me intolerant because I feel this way. I was on the tolerance committee; I try my best to be politically correct.

Speaking of which: this is something that's been bothering me quite a bit lately. What is the definition of racism? Isn't it defined by each country, each individual, every generation differently? What one might consider totally inappropraite might be viewed as highly respectful. Does one's attempts to be politically correct really benefit the world or are there enough people who don't care to counter act all the potential good that one individual might do? If the purpose of cultural celebration is to embrace and accept each others' cultures then why are there still so manyhurt feelings when ones' culture gets misinterpretted? Clearly, no one can no everything about any culture not even one's own.

Anyway, class has started me thinking along those lines. I would love any insights any one might have.To answer the blog question. To put it simply I tell students to outline their paper the way Americans have for generations: Thesis, body, and conclusion. If that's not the best way, well, it's what I know. Take it for what it is worth.

Cudgel in Scrabble

I've been pondering the nature of writing lately, wondering how much it is based on talent, and how much it is based on learned ability. Now obviously, a naturally talented writer will still benefit from instruction, training. Then there are those who may feel they have no talent at all writing and must rely heavily on their training and constantly practice.

It's something I think about a lot when I see someone drawing an amazing picture. I could stand over their shoulder and say, "I wish I could draw like that." And usually the response I get is that I could if I just practiced enough. And it's a nice thought. But a large part of me insists that this person's drawing I'm looking at could only be a product of pure talent. And I may practice all I want but eventually will have to accept my limitations as an artist.

It's similiar with music. We've all seen movies about musical genius such as Shine or Ray. True enough, those artists had to practice a lot to get as good as they were, but, come on, those people were naturals. I have this hard time believing that no amount of practice could ever make me as good as Ray Charles was at the piano. Does having talent encapsulate the drive and motivation to be good at something? Can I learn motivation? Or is that something that cannot be contrived?

These thoughts of mine really make me wonder about my own limitations as a writer. Can I train myself to be a better writer? Probably. But to what extent? When do I accept the limitations that I have? Just how far can my talent take me before I've reached my creative and intellectual peak?

At times when I think I'm a fairly adept writer, the masocist in me insists that I just start reading Kurt Vonnegut or Frank Herbert. It's always a nice reality check for me. One that says, "You either can never be this good, or you started too late in life to be this good." Kind of disturbing I suppose, but it may be a tad healthy to recognize what my limitations as a writer are. And perhaps a benefit of this is that I may lash out occasionally and take on more than I can handle. I'm sure it's positive to attempt things that may seem impossible. Such as writing a good novel. But it's good to try anyway.

The only regret I may have is that I'll never be as funny as the guy who writes these abridged scripts. http://www.the-editing-room.com

A Blog for Gloria Estefan

I never used to like Robert Frost's poetry until I slowed down. (His work is better on long walks rather than crowded buses.) And although I had earlier strayed from the dangers of singy-songy rhyme, I learned something important about classical or traditional poetry and maybe a little why Frost defended it so stubbornly. It seems many developed the idea that meter and rhyme were too "establishment" and that true expression could only be found elsewhere (in confusing nonsense published beneath pretty covers). But I think this new "free verse" may have gone too far. Perhaps the brilliance of Robert Frost, Sara Teasdale, and even Edgar Guest came from the difficulty of expressing new or collective ideas in a specific format. It's a challenge to present something moving in rhyme; it's hard to hear and capture rhythm.

And this carries into prose. I think rhythm is an essential part of writing order. Some students may not be able to fully identify it in their writing, but it's something intuitive like the dissonance we literally feel in the absence of a tonic note at the end of a melody line. Some musicians can use dissonance to their advantage (like some writers), but order and harmony are generally appreciated. "Flow" is rhythm. Rhythm follows order. Order is therefore somewhat intuitive.

Various and Sundry, Including How to Use the MLA Database

1) As promised, here's a handout on how to use the MLA database.

2) The WSU library's main page is here.

3) Here's a direct link to the ILL services.

Also...rather than re-write it, here's my description of the bibliographic essay from last year.