blog, blog! have a merry blog!
Feeling melancholy, wanna go home, don’t really know where that is. When I’m feeling homesick like this I always tell me to hang in, be a grownup, finish school, and if when I’m done I still want to run to Washington, me and I will talk about it. After all, they’re crying for good educators everywhere.
The holidays are here and my family is scattered like so much chaf. Nothing’s changed; this is how it’s always been. We’ve never all been together in the same place at the same time in my whole life. Holidays when I was growing up were traumatic and best over, but now that we’ve all survived it and grown, I wish we could have just one Christmas. I know we can’t—I’ll go visit my mom and talk with all my brothers on the phone (thank you, AT&T, for unlimited weekend minutes), and maybe I’ll even catch my sister home.
I’m getting used to Claire; I hope she’s getting used to me. I’ve heard (ugly) rumors that I am somewhat odd. I’m getting used to the fishbowl effect; I’ve gone from hating it to merely disliking it. I figure the next step is not noticing it. She could be (gasp!) right; I also have noticed (someone mentioned in their blog) students seem a little more comfortable coming in. I’m less hysterically frightened about change since my interview, too. Perhaps I should clarify: I’m still hysterically frightened about change; I just feel reassured that there’s not going to be as much of it as I had feared.
I’m not a rookie anymore. It’s funny. I was really scared when I first started. I guess I wish I’d known just how much work the class was going to be. It’s been a challenge to do this class and education classes at the same time. When Sylvia first told me we were required to take a class, I thought, fine, hang out, learn about verbs, piece of cake…it’s been an awfully lot like work for something I was expecting to be like hanging out. I still would have done it. And it’s over now. (I’m sorry, Scott. I know I still owe you reading responses, but I’m too fried, I’m ‘bout writ out, I’ll be surprised if I make it through this blog.) Advice? Relax, be friendly, don’t be afraid to screw up, no one bites. How’s that?
I’m looking forward to the Christmas party. There will be people there I haven’t seen since orientation, I think. I’m not looking forward to being unemployed for a month, but hey, God hasn’t let me starve yet. I’m glad I know you guys. I hope to know you for a while longer. I’m gonna really miss Kristie, but she’s taking morning classes next semester for her level 2, and so am I, so it’s not like she’s gone from my life. It’s been a fun semester. I learned a lot. I wonder: Will we still be able to ramble around here? Will the blog disappear into cyberspace? Will anyone care? Do I care? (Well, I care. Will I make the time?)
All I want for Christmas is world peace. And to be a better person (my contribution to world peace). I try, I really do. I fall GROSSLY short on a dishearteningly regular basis. I’m not a good enough student, tutor, friend, daughter, sister, cousin, aunt, or niece. On the bright side, I’m a perfect human. Please forgive me for any toes I may have squashed. I know occasionally my mouth goes off without me (that’s why I no longer work for Citigroup--I joke about that, but it's true). I mean well and often it doesn’t show at all. Well, mush, squash, drip, blog…I’m done. Okay, I love you, Buh-bye!