Slacker prompt is slacker prompt
I'm more of a slacker than all y'all...and I'm killing zombies while I'm at it.
I don't know why it's so difficult for people to believe me when I tell them about my awesome zombie dreams. Seriously, I have action-packed, thoroughly insane dreams involving zombies. And shapeshifters. And wacky wizards. And siblings I've never had. And by "awesome" I mean these dreams are worthy of first rate Hollywood production.
Totally.
Sure, zombies are fairly overdone nowadays what with all the crazy zombie hype, which in my opinion is topped by the video game Left 4 Dead. There's no other game I've played where you can shoot your friend in the back and then lock him out of the safe room to distract the horde of diseased, rabid, zombie-like humans trying to rip your team of survivors to pieces. Of course, the said sacrifice often takes out some zombies while he's flailing and yelling and cussing at you and the remaining teammates over the microphone, so it's not a complete loss!
It's totally wicked when you can use your friend as a pipe bomb and then resurrect him in a closet. Maybe that's why the game's tagline is, "It's the zombie apocalypse...bring friends."
So. Why bring up this rather random topic? Well, if I remember correctly, on the first day of class while perusing the syllabus, we came across the H1N1 game plan and apparently learned that it would probably only go in effect in the face of the zombie apocalypse.
Hey, it could happen. And if it did, would YOU be ready to survive it?
Granted, if it's one of those bordering supernatural viruses so popular in various movies (and Left 4 Dead video games), then if you're not inherently immune to it you won't have to worry about surviving! Just run with the rest of the horde and make the survivor's lives more miserable and game-worthy. But if you do end up immune, then how about it? What would you do?
Tip 1: First off, you're going to need to get yourself some friends. Preferably at least two--one who can run faster than you and one who can run slower. You'll especially need the guy who runs slower. Why? Well...let's just say you're going to need a lack of a conscience. No "one for all and all for one" if it means you'll end up as zombie fodder. Survival of the fittest. But just remember: once the guy who runs slower than you ends up dead, you're going to be the slowest.
Tip 2: The second most important item for survival would be a weapon. Or two. Or several. Preferably at least two--a melee and a long range. So let's say a baseball bat and gun. You need the gun for obvious reasons--and while you're at it try to find some bullets. Lots and lots of bullets. You need the baseball bat for when you run out of bullets in the machine gun...plus the bat can beat down walls and windows and doors and hit more than one zombie if you swing it enough. The number one rule to remember with weapons though, is that you really CAN have enough. If it's going to make you the slowest in the group, then it won't matter how many weapons you're carrying--you're going to end up as the group's pipe bomb.
Tip 3: Thirdly, know the territory. If you're running blindly you're going to end up running blindly right into a dead end or an open manhole. Pretty indignant way to die. It also helps to know where's high ground--it seems that quite a few zombie movies and video games portray zombies as being unable to climb up to high areas. Or something. Either way, a few safe houses plus a good idea of where supplies are may save your life.
Well, it seems I've overblown my word count limit so that's it for now kids. Next slacker prompt, we'll try to tackle the vampire discussion and whether they should sparkle or not.
I don't know why it's so difficult for people to believe me when I tell them about my awesome zombie dreams. Seriously, I have action-packed, thoroughly insane dreams involving zombies. And shapeshifters. And wacky wizards. And siblings I've never had. And by "awesome" I mean these dreams are worthy of first rate Hollywood production.
Totally.
Sure, zombies are fairly overdone nowadays what with all the crazy zombie hype, which in my opinion is topped by the video game Left 4 Dead. There's no other game I've played where you can shoot your friend in the back and then lock him out of the safe room to distract the horde of diseased, rabid, zombie-like humans trying to rip your team of survivors to pieces. Of course, the said sacrifice often takes out some zombies while he's flailing and yelling and cussing at you and the remaining teammates over the microphone, so it's not a complete loss!
It's totally wicked when you can use your friend as a pipe bomb and then resurrect him in a closet. Maybe that's why the game's tagline is, "It's the zombie apocalypse...bring friends."
So. Why bring up this rather random topic? Well, if I remember correctly, on the first day of class while perusing the syllabus, we came across the H1N1 game plan and apparently learned that it would probably only go in effect in the face of the zombie apocalypse.
Hey, it could happen. And if it did, would YOU be ready to survive it?
Granted, if it's one of those bordering supernatural viruses so popular in various movies (and Left 4 Dead video games), then if you're not inherently immune to it you won't have to worry about surviving! Just run with the rest of the horde and make the survivor's lives more miserable and game-worthy. But if you do end up immune, then how about it? What would you do?
Tip 1: First off, you're going to need to get yourself some friends. Preferably at least two--one who can run faster than you and one who can run slower. You'll especially need the guy who runs slower. Why? Well...let's just say you're going to need a lack of a conscience. No "one for all and all for one" if it means you'll end up as zombie fodder. Survival of the fittest. But just remember: once the guy who runs slower than you ends up dead, you're going to be the slowest.
Tip 2: The second most important item for survival would be a weapon. Or two. Or several. Preferably at least two--a melee and a long range. So let's say a baseball bat and gun. You need the gun for obvious reasons--and while you're at it try to find some bullets. Lots and lots of bullets. You need the baseball bat for when you run out of bullets in the machine gun...plus the bat can beat down walls and windows and doors and hit more than one zombie if you swing it enough. The number one rule to remember with weapons though, is that you really CAN have enough. If it's going to make you the slowest in the group, then it won't matter how many weapons you're carrying--you're going to end up as the group's pipe bomb.
Tip 3: Thirdly, know the territory. If you're running blindly you're going to end up running blindly right into a dead end or an open manhole. Pretty indignant way to die. It also helps to know where's high ground--it seems that quite a few zombie movies and video games portray zombies as being unable to climb up to high areas. Or something. Either way, a few safe houses plus a good idea of where supplies are may save your life.
Well, it seems I've overblown my word count limit so that's it for now kids. Next slacker prompt, we'll try to tackle the vampire discussion and whether they should sparkle or not.
posted by Keya at 4:25 PM
2 Comments:
Have you seen this?
No! But I have now. And it's filled with LOL.
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