Dang it!
I was determined be the first to break this blog's long silence, but Cameron beat me to the punch. My French homework just HAD to come first. Des fois, la procrastination est vraiment ma bête noire!
But first things first. Where did I put Dr. Rogers's syllabus..? Ah! Here. "Each week, you are required to write 500 words... You may use these entries to reflect on class discussion or your tutoring experience." Okay. I can do this. I'm off to a great start and have only [word count] 408 words to go. Wait. Now I'm down to a mere [word count] 395. Geez, this is a lame blog post. I wonder if anybody's still reading. Writer's block stinks, but I suppose it happens to everyone. Said novelist Gene Fowler, "Writing is simple. You sit and stare at a blank piece of paper until drops of blood form on your forehead."
Simple indeed.
I know! In my cyber-mind's eye, I'll imagine a tutoring session in which I, Michael, am assisting a student, Meta-Michael, with writer's block. Meta-Michael has a [word count] 317-word paper due for his English class, and he would like some guidance.
MICHAEL: Welcome!
META-MICHAEL: Um, hi.
MICHAEL: What brings you to the virtual writing center today?
META-MICHAEL: My paper. I have to write a... 281-word blog post for Dr. Rogers's class.
MICHAEL: Okay. Let me get you signed in here, and then we'll sit down and talk.
META-MICHAEL: That'd be great.
MICHAEL takes the necessary information from META-MICHAEL, and after navigating a maze of computers, computer chairs, and other tutors, they sit down at a table. They chat for a moment, and META-MICHAEL is struck by the similarities he senses between himself and MICHAEL. MICHAEL, however, claims not to perceive any such similarities. Their conversation continues, genially.
MICHAEL: So what is Dr. Rogers expecting from this 220-word posting?
META-MICHAEL: Well, his syllabus says to reflect on class discussions and tutoring experience.
MICHAEL: What have you written so far?
META-MICHAEL: Haven't you read the preceding paragraphs? Nothing, really. I'm having a tough time getting started.
MICHAEL: That's okay. Writer's block happens to everyone, even Gene Fowler. Why don't we spend the next 133 words brainstorming together? Our sessions, sadly, are somewhat limited, but before we run out of words, I'm sure we can come up with some ideas for your blog.
META-MICHAEL: I'm willing to try anything.
MICHAEL: Great! Let's get started. Why don't you tell me about your last tutoring experience?
META-MICHAEL: I've never actually tutored. I've barely started the training.
MICHAEL: I see. Well, I'm sure you'll have more than ample opportunity in the future. Do you have any fears about tutoring?
META-MICHAEL: No, not really. Fear is probably too strong of a word. I fear snakes. I fear spiders. I fear the ontological awareness of my own existence. But tutoring? I might feel a little nervous because I've never held a tutoring session, but not fearful.
MICHAEL: Tell me about your last class. What did you discuss in your last class with Dr. Rogers?
META-MICHAEL: Smarties.
MICHAEL: Smarties?
META-MICHAEL: Yeah. Did you know they have bubblegum ones now? When people look at the wrapper, they'll naturally expect a tart, chalky candy inside, but it's really bubblegum. Pretty scandalous, huh?
MICHAEL: What did you talk about after Smarties?
META-MICHAEL: I don't re... Oh! That's right! We talked about how to begin a tutoring session.
To be continued...
But first things first. Where did I put Dr. Rogers's syllabus..? Ah! Here. "Each week, you are required to write 500 words... You may use these entries to reflect on class discussion or your tutoring experience." Okay. I can do this. I'm off to a great start and have only [word count] 408 words to go. Wait. Now I'm down to a mere [word count] 395. Geez, this is a lame blog post. I wonder if anybody's still reading. Writer's block stinks, but I suppose it happens to everyone. Said novelist Gene Fowler, "Writing is simple. You sit and stare at a blank piece of paper until drops of blood form on your forehead."
Simple indeed.
I know! In my cyber-mind's eye, I'll imagine a tutoring session in which I, Michael, am assisting a student, Meta-Michael, with writer's block. Meta-Michael has a [word count] 317-word paper due for his English class, and he would like some guidance.
MICHAEL: Welcome!
META-MICHAEL: Um, hi.
MICHAEL: What brings you to the virtual writing center today?
META-MICHAEL: My paper. I have to write a... 281-word blog post for Dr. Rogers's class.
MICHAEL: Okay. Let me get you signed in here, and then we'll sit down and talk.
META-MICHAEL: That'd be great.
MICHAEL takes the necessary information from META-MICHAEL, and after navigating a maze of computers, computer chairs, and other tutors, they sit down at a table. They chat for a moment, and META-MICHAEL is struck by the similarities he senses between himself and MICHAEL. MICHAEL, however, claims not to perceive any such similarities. Their conversation continues, genially.
MICHAEL: So what is Dr. Rogers expecting from this 220-word posting?
META-MICHAEL: Well, his syllabus says to reflect on class discussions and tutoring experience.
MICHAEL: What have you written so far?
META-MICHAEL: Haven't you read the preceding paragraphs? Nothing, really. I'm having a tough time getting started.
MICHAEL: That's okay. Writer's block happens to everyone, even Gene Fowler. Why don't we spend the next 133 words brainstorming together? Our sessions, sadly, are somewhat limited, but before we run out of words, I'm sure we can come up with some ideas for your blog.
META-MICHAEL: I'm willing to try anything.
MICHAEL: Great! Let's get started. Why don't you tell me about your last tutoring experience?
META-MICHAEL: I've never actually tutored. I've barely started the training.
MICHAEL: I see. Well, I'm sure you'll have more than ample opportunity in the future. Do you have any fears about tutoring?
META-MICHAEL: No, not really. Fear is probably too strong of a word. I fear snakes. I fear spiders. I fear the ontological awareness of my own existence. But tutoring? I might feel a little nervous because I've never held a tutoring session, but not fearful.
MICHAEL: Tell me about your last class. What did you discuss in your last class with Dr. Rogers?
META-MICHAEL: Smarties.
MICHAEL: Smarties?
META-MICHAEL: Yeah. Did you know they have bubblegum ones now? When people look at the wrapper, they'll naturally expect a tart, chalky candy inside, but it's really bubblegum. Pretty scandalous, huh?
MICHAEL: What did you talk about after Smarties?
META-MICHAEL: I don't re... Oh! That's right! We talked about how to begin a tutoring session.
To be continued...
posted by Michael Madson at 9:41 PM
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