Fears

I am afraid of ruining a session. My biggest fear is that I will totally ruin my first session, and no one will want me to tutor. I know that I am being dramatic, but I really do fear that I will completely go wrong with my first sessions. I do not want to mislead anyone. I might not know the correct answers, (and I know it is okay to ask someone) but I might think information is correct but what if I am wrong? I do not know all the different grammar rules, but if a writer asks, I do not want to teach something completely wrong. I also know that grammar should not be my main concern, but if a writer asks, I cannot ignore the request. I am also afraid that I will not understand what the writer is trying to accomplish. I will ask the writer what his or her goals are, what are some of the problems etc., but what if I do not know how to reach the goals or fix the mistakes myself? I do not want to misinterpret the writer, set off in a wrong direction, and confuse the writer. Along with that, I am afraid that I will not be able to express myself. Sometimes I have a really hard time with words, and I am afraid that I will not be able to state clearly what I mean. On paper, expressing myself is different because I can take my time and review what I wrote, but I only have twenty minutes with each writer. I do not want to spend half of that time trying to express a single concept. I think that is my biggest concern. Sometimes my friends will understand what I am saying, but people I barely know will not get what I am trying to teach them. I also have not taken many college English classes, so I might not know what to do with certain papers. I do not know the different rules for different papers, so I am scared I will not be able to help the writer at all. I especially do not know what to do with scientific papers. I do not know if they follow an English format or if they need a thesis. I have no clue what to look for. And, there are so many different ideas about resumes I do not know how to treat a resume. Different papers like that intimidate me. I am also unsure about organization. I had a very hard time with how to organize my English papers last year. My professor had to walk me through each paper. How am I supposed to help with a big topic like organization, if I cannot do it myself? Lastly, I am afraid that I will not be able to identify where the boundaries are. I want to be aware of where the different lines are, but I have a feeling that in an actual session, I will not be as concerned with the lines. But, that means that I may more easily cross them and overwhelm a writer. I may sound like I am a nervous wreck, but I really am not. These are just the different concerns I have. I will be a little scared in my first shift, but I think I will be okay. And, once I get working more, I think I will be more comfortable. Plus, my tutoring class will help me, and teach me a lot. I think the biggest reason for all of these fears is that I do not know what to expect. However, I am excited to find out what a tutoring session is like.