Professor Xavier can do it. I can't.

I think my earliest memory of writing argumentative papers comes from Ms. Robinson's ninth grade English. If I recall, we had to do persuasive/argumentative papers on a topic of our choice. I chose the benefits of natural medicine over over-the-counter drugs. I'm not sure where I came across that topic, actually, but it must have been a really good paper because I never saw it again after I turned it in, even though everyone else in my class got it back. Oh well. It's never good to dwell on the past--and it's often especially painful to dwell on past writing.

Over time, I've picked up bits and pieces of writing arguments from various professors, although I can really only remember Ms. Robinson's brief, watered down lesson. Oh, and I remember stuff from my English 2010 class last year. Especially the technique of pulling in and acknowledging the other side's opinions and views, only to systematically discredit and refute in the most brutal, but professional, means possible. I mean, I feel like I'm taking someone's beliefs and squashing them with a big fat stamp that says "FALSE." Or maybe that's just the way I was taught to view it. Either way, I'm glad at least one teacher pointed out that important element in writing argumentative papers--I know that I was subconsciously aware of it before, but it was nice to hear it laid out in actual words.

Yes. Anyway.

So, what's one thing I wish I had learned about writing arguments?

How to read minds.

It would make life so easy. In every class that I have taken that requires the constant construction of papers, my first writing assignment always ends up being the poor guinea pig. Sure, the professor tells you what he or she wants to see in the paper, but no one ever really knows until the stupid thing comes back--often times with a lower grade than expected. Granted, after that first paper, I can usually figure out what the professor is expecting and be better prepared for the next go around. But still it frustrates me immensely! Sometimes, professors might think that they've explained the requirements thoroughly enough to allow their students to do a good job, but oftentimes it ends up a guessing game where the students are required to read minds like a Professor Xavier. Othertimes, I think the professors just want to watch their sudents fail miserably that first time so they can use it as an example while simultaneously laughing their evil cackles behind the students' backs.

But that's just college for you.

All in all, I feel fairly comfortable about writing arugments. However, helping to tutor a student who is writing an argument without imposing my own views and ideas on him or her can be a huge challenge. Hey, I guess that's something else I wish I'd be taught--how to deal with flying evil fairies.

...yeah, now I've lost myself.