Where are we going, eh?

Tutors should "set an agenda" of some sort, right? Well, lately I feel like I am discovering a gap between what the student wants to accomplish in a tutoring session and what I want to accomplish. I'm afraid that I might be missing an important step in the negotiation process. But I don't think so. I ask what the assignment is, who the teacher is... what the student would like to talk about... I ask questions... I give options. This is good; is it not?

Well, what if I have already worked with a student before? Does that mean that the student and I should go through the "setting the agenda for the next 30 minutes" thing again? To answer my own question: YES. I think so. Otherwise you could experience the same session again. I know because I've done it. What happens if you don't set the agenda? Either hardly anything productive and much confusion on my part (was I any good at all? We didn't have a goal so we didn't get anywhere) or you fall back to the goal you had last time and you achieve it like you did last time.

There is a somebody who hangs out in the Writing Center a lot. He signs up to work with tutors (not just me) to work on his presentation project. That's not a problem--- that's what we're here for: to help students with their writing projects. The problem that I'm seeing is that he doesn't like to go through the negotiation process. I have to constantly ask: "what do you want to do for the next 20 minutes?" and "what do you want me to look at? What questions do you have for me?" He avoids answering my questions and leaps into the session without setting a clear goal with me. I don't really know what he wants to accomplish, but he has jumped into it--- he must know what he wants to get done, right? I decide that I will just dive in with him and find out where he is taking me. In some tutoring sessions this is okay... it works---ish. I establish a goal by discovering what the student is thinking along the way and then I confirm the goal with the student and I'm in the game. But what if I never figure out the writer's thinking? What if I can't follow to wherever the heck he or she is taking me? The writer might want to be going to a beach in California and I'm lost in the mountains... in Alaska. How do I find my way back?

I know it was a while ago when we talked about setting the agenda, and don't think that I just barely get it. Don't think, "oh, gees, Kassie. You can't set the agenda? We talked about that so long ago." I can--- I negotiate the best that I can anyway. But I can't do it alone. What I'm getting at is....Negotiation: it takes more than one person. Tutors can't negotiate a session alone. I understand a student might want control of the session; he or she knows what they want to accomplish, but I'm getting paid to help them... can't the student and I come to a compromised goal? I feel like saying, "At least let me know where you're going; let me see if I can help you. Isn't that why you signed up for a session?"

On the flip side, tutors don't want to "take-over," especially right from the start. There needs to be common ground. I think that is where I am finding the gap. It's a communication gap. If the student doesn't want to find common ground and I can't convince the writer to let me in on the objective of the session so we can work together... then what? Should I be like Tyler and say "NEXT PLEASE!" ? We're obviously not working together if I'm playing with polar bears and penguins in Alaska and he is avoiding sharks while surfing in California.